Varying forms of agitation

SQUIRREL!

I am a bit concerned about the ability of my brain to concentrate on one task for a long time anymore. I blame this on the invention of internet tabs. It used to be that you opened up your dial up connection, waited patiently for it to BEEEEE and BOOOOOOP and CHHHHHHHZZZZ and then you were on your one page you wanted to do something on before going on to the other page of the internet you visited, like AOL. Now, you open up your computer, and in an instant you’re on your browser, and if you’re like me, Facebook is your homepage. So before you’re even DOING anything, you’re doing something, and a quick scan of your newsfeed shows this funny video from your friend who always knows what the funny videos are and so you go to watch it, but UGH it has to BUFFER, and so you hit pause to let it catch up and then BAM: NEW TAB! Any activity that requires me to upload pictures is the worst offender to my ADD-enabling, because it always takes more than .5 seconds and boy, do we know what a huge yawning gap of time that is in internet-surfing land. Whole URLS are created and destroyed! 720 new topics start trending! Eight of your friends go from In a Relationship to It’s Complicated! And so on.

It’s a wonder I even finish putting my second leg into pants in the morning. I do seem to wear a lot of skirts lately.

An Ode to Coffee Shop Gift Cards (And The People Who Give Them)

Yesterday I came home from work and discovered that a college friend/FB acquaintance/generally awesome person I know had sent me a hefty gift certificate to a coffee shop near my work that I frequent. Or I would frequent, if our budget allowed me to be a person who frequented coffee shops. No lie, that very morning on my way to work I had spent a good 15 minutes thinking of ways to hint to people who might be thinking of getting me a birthday gift that money to a coffee shop would be heavenish. Without sounding like I was asking for it outright. Which I would have been doing. And may still do.

Anyhooskis! I was flabbergasted at the gift card (and I don’t use that word lightly! FLABBERGASTED, I was!) and also elated. Because: Free coffee! That I can has! Every day if I want until the funds run out! Coffee in the morning? Uh, duh! Mid-afternoon coffee break? Why, I’d be delighted! Coffee nightcap? Make mine half-caf! (Heavy on the caf!) Also, do you know what the best thing about coffee gift cards is? You have to spend them on coffee. No making yourself crazy about whether you should spend this nice sum you just received on something practical like shoes for your kids or that thing in your kitchen you’ve been meaning to fix. Decision’s made, no takebacks. You will drink that amount of money of coffee (or perhaps a pastry, if you’re feeling kicky), AND YOU WILL LIKE IT.

(I will like it. Very much. Thanks Amanda!)

Thwarted Plans, Unthwarted

A little over a week ago I developed a slight cough that turned into a definite cough and then a makes-you-want-to-reach-down-your-throat-and-scoop-your-lung-matter-out-of-your-chest cough. Somewhere along the way I also Fell Ill, the kind of Ill that requires that you take to your bed and lie in repose because of melancholy humours and whatnot. Unfortunately, this happened the afternoon of L and my 10th anniversary. Happy anniversary hon! Here is some phlegm.

Our plan had been to both work half a day and then meet up for lunch and an afternoon of whatever. No, not just whatever, ANNIVERSARY whatever. EPIC whatever. (We had plans to … go to IKEA.)

Lunch was good–a new place, which I am historically bad at trying out. When you have little money, you want to make sure any of it you spend on eating out will be for something you like, and the only way to ensure that happens (in my meager-budget influenced mind) is to go somewhere you’ve been before, and get something you already know you like. But we had a Scoutmob coupon (holla, Nicole!) and an adventurous anniversary spirit, so new place it was. (P.S. It was good, and also not burritos. I know, right? Like I said, adventurous anniversary spirit!)

After that, we attempted IKEA, (and let me just say, before you make fun of a trip to IKEA as a way to spend an anniversary afternoon off from work with your husband of 10 years: let me just tell you that kid-free time to browse in a store is WAY up there on the list of Stuff I Love But Don’t Often Get To Indulge In, following right on the heels of Drink Coffee From Coffee Shops, so hushupnah) but halfway between the HENSVIKs and the VÄRDEs I sort of lost the will to put one foot in front of the other and had to take a 10 minute break on an EKTORP. You guys, I tried so hard to pretend I wasn’t sick. We moved on to rugs, but I kept resting my head on each one and saying “The pile on this one is softzzzzz.” Finally I admitted defeat and we left with only a pack of wooden hangers and a tiny ceramic vase. For an IKEA haul, that is Grade-A LAME. And then speaking of lame,  we went home and took a nap.

The next day was supposed to be the crowing jewel of the anniversary week: the kids were to stay overnight with my sister in her new place. But after I slept face down and open-mouthed drooling in a feverish heap for the entire morning and part of the afternoon, it was clear that we needed to scrap that pipe dream, too. This of course made me all WOE and FIE and LIFE IS CRUEL AND TERRIBLE until I realized that it just meant we got to have our date this weekend instead of last. And so this Friday it is! We may even go see a movie in a theater.

Because we’ve been married for a decade, and we’re going all out, baby. R + L 4-EVAH!

3 comments

1 ginnymom { 08.18.11 at 7:27 am }

where’s the like button on this blog?

“Like.”

2 Darth { 08.18.11 at 3:43 pm }

Possible suggestion for a movie: THE HELP. It’s not the greatest movie of all time, and maybe you have to have grown up in the South a little earlier in time to get the full benefit, but it is pretty good IMHO.

3 Neely { 08.24.11 at 3:47 pm }

Alls I’m sayin’ is Ikea very nearly ruined our marriage because we are both way way too ADD for that place and we got overwhelmed, then lost, and then had an enormous fight over a colander, and left with things that we never meant to buy including a colander of bitter memories and two mirrors that were exactly the same. I think they put something in the Swedish meatballs (which incidentally is where the exit is, if you’re lost). So, watch out.

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