Well hello, and welcome to my new and improved website! The one with the fancy new Twitter badge over there on the right sidebar! It is so shiny and nice! (And also the basic badge every 2nd grader can add to their sidebar, that I only just figured out how to fix.)
Ok, so that’s the only thing that’s different. But ooh! Twitter box! Let’s all look at it, adoringly.
Anyhoo! I was thinking about how I really wish this site were a little more snazzified. And by snazzified, I mean functional. First of all, the banner at the top does not link to anything. Oh, but it used to! Back in the day when you were treated to the visual delight of L Slip n’ Sliding in his work clothes and a giant photo of an eraser and six or seven other pictures on rotate, the header could be clicked for handy home page refreshment purposes. But then I decided I was smart enough to figure out a header on my own, spent about 17 hours cussing, sweating and stress eating over it, slapped one up there, and declared it awesome … except for the part where it doesn’t link to anything, meaning that there is no way to click back to home if you’re reading a specific post. But other than that!
Also, I wish there were Older posts/Newer post buttons at the bottom of any page, so that you could navigate the archives easier. And I wish that the Snapshot was a link to a page with all the previous Snapshots I’ve ever posted. (Although that would require time travel, because I have not saved a list of those anywhere, so I’d have to go back to 2007 and tell myself to keep track of that stuff for Pete’s sake. And also: just go ahead and throw out that one pair of jeans. 2007 self would know which ones I was talking about. And if she didn’t, I’d show her some (terrible, terrible) pictures from the future.) And I wish that I had kept up with categories for my posts. I have dreams of sitting down for an entire day and cataloging them, one by one. Doesn’t that sound like a kick in the pants!
I also wish that I had a button on the sidebar that shot money straight out of the disc drive of my laptop every time you clicked it. I mean, if I’m being honest here.
How about you? What drives you bonkers about this site? Maybe I can actually fix it! Who knows! Stranger things have happened! (Like this.) Quick, now’s your chance to tell me all the things that have been keeping you up at night as you lay there fretting over the navigation and content of my personal blog. Which, don’t lie, I know you do.
It’s ok, really—I can take suggestions for improvement. I will only feel woefully inadequate for like 30, maybe 45 seconds, TOPS.