Real talk

R. Kelly – Trend Setter, Cultural Icon

My brother once told me that he and his college buds picked up a new slang term that was handy to use when you wanted to say “But seriously though..” or “In all seriousness…” and of course, it came from everyone’s favorite source of  slang terms: an R. Kelly song. Real talk, y’all, that is the best worst song on the internet.

For Every Weekend Still Shot, There Is A Just Out Of Frame Of The Weekend Still Shot Shot

Debbie left this comment on my last Weekend Still Shot post, and I wanted to take a moment to address it, as she is not the only person who has inquired about the apparent lack of clutter in my house. I feel as though I have somehow deluded the dear readers of Yestertime with my keen skills of framing a shot just so and my liberal use of the iPhoto “Crop” feature. After seeing her comment I decided it was time to clear up some notions about the state of my house, and so I immediately stood up, walked into three different rooms of my house and took the following photos, and am now presenting them here with no after-editing:

Real talk, Yestertime. There is clutter afoot.

Laugh Until It Hurts

Great Scott but the show was fun. I was a drunk Irish man! And then a person in a coffee shop! And then a lady in her pajamas! And then Wonder Woman! And several other things in between! It was exhilarating and challenging and exhausting and fantastic.  I enjoyed getting to know all the different people who took the class with me, and recall often what one fellow classmate said when asked on the first night why she was taking a sketch comedy class – she said, simply, “I want to be free.” Yes to that, ma’am. Yes to that.

But as freeing as the experience was, it was also, as it turns out, fraught with peril. In my great haste to accomplish quick changes from costume to costume I sustained several minor injuries, the most grievous of which involved being slammed into a wooden beam by the man in our group best suited in stature to play the roles of a giant grizzly bear and The Incredible Hulk. Yeow. Here is my gnarly bruise, which is actually much healed in this picture:

Sometimes I like to look down at my right thigh and squint and pretend like I have a tan.

Mr. Bear/Hulk felt incredibly bad about mowing me down, but I told him that it was not a problem, don’t worry about it, it didn’t really hurt all that much, anyway. But I was a little bit bummed, because geez, come on – now who was going to believe my performance as Wonder Woman? You think Wonder Woman is gonna let anyone get anywhere close to bruising her superheroic legs? Oh HELL no. In the end it worked out though because it just meant I had to dig that much deeper into the character and work hard to take the audience on that ride with me. Which, let’s face it, is a good thing, because while it’s true that Wonder Woman would probably not have a giant hematoma on her leg, she sure as HELL wouldn’t have post-multiple-baby muffin tops and a soft fleshy roll hanging over her golden belt, either. So a little extra effort at the overall pretense was certainly not a waste for anyone.

I Made This Cornbread With My Bare Hands (And A Skillet) And Lo It Was Good.

While we’re Real Talking, I do want to say that I probably lean pretty hard on the exaggeration side when describing my culinary skills, (or lack thereof) but what is really, sincerely true about me and the kitchen is that I do not usually enjoy my time spent there. And true to form I did not enjoy making this cornbread, because it was just for regular old dinner and my kids were feral and I was tired and etc. etc. etc., but even so, I say unto you DAYUM it was tasty. It almost made up for the fact that I accidentally left out three of the ingredients in the main dish.

And that is probably the first and last time you will see a picture of something I produced for eating on this weblog. Because Dear Cooking, I’m Just Not That Into You. Sincerely, Rachel.

(But, real talk? The outside was all crispy like a hush puppy and the inside was just the right amount of moist, and the butter melted in the little nooks and crannies and mmmmn;hashkafwebnpbbbbtttttt Homer Simpson voice mmmmcorrrrrrnbread now I’m hungry.)

Real talk.

6 comments

1 Gramps { 08.31.10 at 10:00 pm }

The porch looks pretty clean, actually. And your Grammy would be proud of the cornbread.

2 Jo(s)e(ph) { 09.01.10 at 12:27 am }

Real talk that cornbread was pretty good.

3 Aunt Sare { 09.01.10 at 12:30 am }

Awwwwwwww. Grammy :)

4 Ashlyn { 09.01.10 at 6:57 pm }

Real talk: your blog is my most favorite internet treat to myself. Keep it coming, please. :)

5 Sam { 09.02.10 at 12:38 pm }

Real talk, I am so glad your house looks like mine! Who knew that adding another child to the mix (and one that can’t move toys himself quite yet) could still aid in destroying what sense of organization I felt. There is none anymore. Thank you for the pictures :-)

6 Anjie { 09.03.10 at 7:48 am }

For real that bruise only looks like a birthmark or something now. It looked like a near fatal wound last week! Way to heal…you know, your entire leg.

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