Impasse

We’ve reached that dreaded point in settling in to a new house called Functioning Pretty Well But Still A Godawful Mess.  Meaning the kitchen is up and running without a hitch, but I still have to step over four boxes to get into my bedroom closet and have done so for many days on end.  I always have a fear at this point in moving that things will just stay this way forever – coasters will go on top of cardboard and we’ll start referring to it as “the side table” or we’ll just go on using that extra large box as a baby gate because, hey – we don’t need those winter coats just yet!

The person that this system actually kind of works for is Noah, who gets to experience a mini-Christmas every time we shove some pile over to get to something important and unearth another (OMG ANOTHER) box of toys.  “MY JET!” he screams. “MY SMALL GREEN DINOSAUR WHOSE NAME I CAN’T REMEMBER!”  He’s reunited, and clearly it feels so good.

I, however, feel as though I need a Organization Intervention.  Like one of those people who can come into your house and take all your crap and rearrange it and somehow make it look like page 21 of the Pottery Barn catalog.  I dream of some perfectly coiffed, perfumed woman breezing in and with a wave of her hand saying, “But Darling! Just put this warped particle board shelf here and put this plant on there and VOILA: you are feng shuied!”  And then we’d go have cappuccinos and lady fingers in the (also feng shuied, duh) kitchen.

One problem is that I keep thinking that we’ll finish unpacking a room “after X.” X being….we die? I’m not sure what I’m waiting for, because it is becoming obvious to me that “free time” is pretty much a bygone these days, along with “sleep” and “cognizance.”

Maybe the solution is just to throw open all the last leftover boxes and just put everything in them on the nearest surface and then have a few friends over and then deadbolt the doors behind them and say NO ONE LEAVES UNTIL THIS LIVING ROOM IS OOZING WITH POSITIVE CHI.

I think it would work.

August 18, 2009   11 Comments