I’m at a coffee shop trying to write some blog posts so that when people type in this web address they aren’t greeted with a chorus of virtual crickets every day.  I’m not sure how successful this endeavor will be, seeing as how my sleep deprived brain can’t remember anything farther back than five sec- wait, what was I talking about?  Oh right.  Poop.

Rosie is on day three of an All Input No Output jag and understandably is not very happy about it.  Every time I go to feed her now I have this fear that she’ll explode.  I mean, there’s got to be a hull breach imminent, am I right?  There is only so much room in that tiny belly.  Things we’ve tried: bicycle legs, water, belly rubs, cutting out rice cereal, warm baths.  Things we’re close to trying: a bottle full of strong coffee with a prune juice shot and crushed up Ex-Lax, performing an enema on a Rosie voodoo doll, having a Shit Seance.  We won’t really do these things, obviously.  Probably.  Most likely.

In other news, I am getting very acquainted with the Godforsaken hours of 2am, 4am, and 5:45, as Rosie is waking up like clockwork at those times.  This is after waking up at 8:15pm and 10:30pm and sometimes 11:45 if she’s feeling kicky.  There is a plan for nipping this wakey-wakeyness in the bud that we are eager to implement, once her bowels are in order.  And I’ve now decided that that would be a great phrase to use when feeling out of sorts.  No, I’m sorry, I won’t be in today.  My bowels are not in order.  Maybe tomorrow.  Anyway, the plan is to finish reading “The No-Cry Sleep Solution” and then get into a huddle and draw out the plan with little xs and os and arrows and then yell BREAK! really loud and then run our plays over and over again until we get a touchdown, otherwise known as SLACKJAWED DROOL SLEEEEEEEEP.

Maybe then this blog will go back to being about interesting things, like bad TV and burritos.


1 Amy { 04.27.09 at 10:54 am }

I love that book. Good luck!

2 Leigh Ann { 04.27.09 at 11:17 am }

josh had some major problems with constipation at that age. so bad that when he finally did go he would scream in pain, and a couple times we actually had to manually help him. :(
we tried prune juice, karo syrup in his bottle (i don’t recommend). finally what worked for him was a mixture of apple juice and water once a day. we figured out it was the iron fortified formula and rice cereal. just too much iron for his tummy. we gave him the water/apple juice mixture once a day (it was only about 2 oz total), and sometimes would mix a little bit of prunes in with his rice cereal. good luck! i know how frustrating that can be!

3 Dorothy { 04.27.09 at 12:24 pm }

can’t help you on the poop front – taylor has pooped at least three times a day for her whole life. girl is efficient.

But I totally feel your no-sleep pain. I would like to hear how the book is and if it works for future reference. Even though I thought I would never do it, we finally had to let her cry at a year-old because I couldn’t take it anymore and we thought we had tried everything possible (I didn’t know about this book). The good news was it only took 2 nights of crying (about 5-10 minutes each time) to get her to sleep straight through. It was terribly painful and emotionaly draining, but I was becoming a very mean, grouchy person – and so was she because she was tired all of the time so something had to be done. Good luck!

4 Kecia { 04.27.09 at 3:58 pm }

Alas, we shouldn’t have let Elliot plot with her at the cousins’ weekend . . . He’s been on Miralax once a day since the cruise, and successfully thwarted the Pantley book. Let’s hopeyou have better success!

5 Shayleen { 04.27.09 at 9:10 pm }

Hannah had poop issues too and was also on Miraax and it worked wonders!!! As for the sleeping thing…i just wish you luck in whatever you choose to do. I don’t think there is a right or wrong solution. I was totally against “the crying out” method but after 8 months of NO sleep I did it and it only took a few days of crying and she learned how to self sooth and it was smooth sailing after that. She will be 6 years old this week, and the few days of “crying it out” didn’t harm her at all. Just do what you feel good about and litte Rosie will catch on. My biggest advice would be CONSISTANCY. Once you start something, stick with it. GOod Luck!!

6 Trenches of Mommyhood { 04.28.09 at 10:46 am }

Just had constipation trauma with my 4yrold. Not to be gross but what about uh…rectal stimulation? Like taking her temp rectally? Because uh…that seemed to REALLY WORK when my pediatrician did it w/ said 4yrold.

7 racher { 04.28.09 at 11:48 am }

I’m going to call the pediatrician today and see what they recommend. I gave her peaches today, but still no brown in this town…

8 Abbey Wrenn Lesher { 04.29.09 at 9:41 am }

My little guy once went 8 days. 8 days! It was a total mess but prune juice seemed to do it. Dr. said to put about 2oz. prune juice (diluted) of course in a bottle and give it to him twice a day until he pooped. It didn’t take long after that. Sitting in the bumbo always seemed to get things moving, too. Good luck.

We did BabyWise with Allen and he has been a great sleeper. The crying is hard but it really only takes a few days. I would set the oven timer, turn down the volume on the monitor and then vaccuum, watch tv, hop in the shower..(usually cry, too). Anything to try and distract myself for 10-20 minutes… Super hard, but really, it was so worth it!

I know there’s no ‘right’ way but I hope you find something that works for you and Rosie. Best of luck!

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