I can’t not post the night before The Big Race, seeing as how it is one of the main things that has kept me away from the computer this week.  Any and all free time I had was devoted to pounding the pavement in the Desperate Attempt Not To Look Like An Ass On Race Day.  As it stands, I have run the equivalent of a 5K twice, both times walking the length of three mailboxes about half a mile from the finish.  You know, because there was this long hill, it was hot, I had a rock in my shoe, my lungs were milliseconds from exploding, blah blah WHATEVER.  Regardless: I call success!

So I’m pumped for tomorrow AM (and by “pumped” I mean FREAKED THE HELL OUT) and am trying to figure out a way not to look all geeky and nervous before a race that some people will just be out to jog in 20 minutes like it’s No Big Deal.  My neighbor, who does these godawful things called “Triathalons” (and sidenote, I’m pretty sure if I died right this second and was seen to be Unfit at the gates of Heaven, St. Peter would point the other direction and say “There’s your bike, the swimming portion is 1 million miles that way.  Have a nice afterlife!”) made some comment the other day about how 5Ks were so casual and no biggie, and I know that’s true when you’ve done one before, but man, for me this is like jumping off the high dive for the very first time.  I’m about to climb that ladder and leap off into space and my stomach, she is abutterflyin’.

I think the main reason I feel like this is because one, I really want to RUN the whole thing, and I am anxious to see if this happens, and two, people are going to witness my Old Man Jog.  Two words about that: Not. Pretty.

Even so, there will be documentation of the momentous occasion that will most surely be set to music for maximum effect.   Unless I am carried off on a stretcher.  Then I’ll probably skip the soundtrack.

Right.  If I’m carried off on a stretcher, you know there will be a FULL ORCHESTRAL SCORE backing that action up.

Cue Chariots of Fire!

*Note: race starts at 9:15 EDT, if you are into good vibe sending.