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Why Is That Camera Following Me Around and Who Are Stacy and Clinton:

I am in desperate need of new clothes.  I have two pairs of jeans that are in heavy rotation: one pair that slide down my backside and reveal my skivvies every time I bend over, and one pair that spend the entire day devoted to slicing heavy indentions into my muffin tops.  Other than that I have sweatpants.  My wardrobe is grim.  However, our bank account does not support jean shopping at the moment, unless I want to spend an afternoon at the Last Chance Thrift pawing through moth ball smelling acid washed Guess? jeans with tapered legs and an upside down triangle on the back pocket.  Maybe I should just go for it and start a new retro trend with big white scrunchies and Hypercolor shirts while I’m at it.

Project 5K: The Dumbest Idea Of All Time:

The situation has become dire.  I made it to 2.5 miles (once) about a week and a half ago and then five days went by with no chance for running and the next run was awful.  The tunes were not grooving and I could barely make 2 miles.   I am mildly panicked about this, seeing as the race is in nine days, with a forecast of “Someone Better Start Building a Big Boat” for the next five.  I have no treadmill.  YOU GUYS.  Am I going to make it?  Are people going to throw rocks at me for being a 5K poseur? WILL THEY REVOKE MY T-SHIRT RIGHTS?

I am in need of motivation. And encouragement. And Valium.

I Love Rosie and Her Hamhock Legs:

Tonight when I was rocking Rosie to sleep she executed her newest trick of reaching up to her pacifier and pulling it out with a THWOCK, but then she took the maneuver to a whole new level by lodging it right in my open mouth.

Lessons learned: #1 Mouths should be kept closed around babies with access to them (a lesson which should already have been filed away after the Great Spit Up/Kiss Incident) and #2 It takes considerably longer for your baby to fall asleep if you are shaking them around with your jiggly belly laugh.



1 Rachel W { 03.12.09 at 2:52 pm }

I know I’ve said it before, but- I PROMISE that when you get to the race and all the people around you start running, you’re going to be amazed at how easy it is and you won’t want to stop. If you do, however, feel like your lungs are going to come out of your mouth, then walk. Lots and lots of people do it and I guarantee that you will NOT be the last one across the finish line. Either way, you’ll be running/walking 5k more than you would have watching the race from the sidelines.
You’re gonna surprise yourself at how well you do. :)

2 Sam { 03.12.09 at 2:53 pm }

You can do it! I know you can! Even if you have to walk a portion of it, they won’t revoke the t-shirt (I know, I did it in the Peachtree). AND there is hope yet, 2 months ago, I could barely run 2 miles without stopping, now I can run 5! I am cheering you on!

3 Allen { 03.12.09 at 2:54 pm }

Solidarity, sister. I can personally testify that you get the shirt no matter what…

4 amy { 03.12.09 at 2:55 pm }

1. My daughter puked in my mouth once. I lifted her up for a kiss and it shot right into my mouth. Fun times. (For the record, though, I did not puke myself because I am an awesome mom. Right?)

2. I prefer walking and running in the rain. Call me crazy, but it breaks up the monotony. Also, less people out to laugh at me and see me nearly-puking on the sidewalk.

3. Sorry for the puke-heavy comment.

5 Jo(s)e(ph) { 03.12.09 at 6:06 pm }

brilliant title. i realize, however, that maybe not everyone will immediately understand the double meaning behind it.

oh, and, do you want a dollar?

6 racher { 03.12.09 at 6:58 pm }

I will gih him his money.

Do it now Daddy. Do it RIGHTQUICK.

Ha! That never gets old. Never.

7 Gramps { 03.12.09 at 9:27 pm }

Agreed! It’s one of many sayings we empty nesters repeat around this house on a regular basis, right up there with
“You know that TV guy, who’s on that show? He’s so funny!”
“When I get fthree I doh to daytamp, when I get fthree.”
“Hey, I got a good ‘dea!”

8 Amanda { 03.13.09 at 8:10 am }

You will be fine at the race!! And you won’t be the last person to finish, I promise!! You’ll get the shirt, you’ll love the crowds, and then it’ll be over and you can decide when you want to run another one. :) Peachtree is July…you have time to train. :)

9 Leigh Ann { 03.13.09 at 11:17 am }

ha ha! AMY- i don’t know you, but my son also puke in my mouth as i was holding him above me for kisses! i too did not puke. and yes, it is because WE ARE AWESOME MOMS!

rachel–i have total faith you will kick that 5 k’s ass!

10 Lisa { 03.13.09 at 3:31 pm }

I am a runner…have been a runner since age 14 and I can’t make it 2 miles lately without the urge to upchuck. if it’s the tour decatur you’re running, I’ll walk with you whenever you want too (Gillum and I are doing it…notice I didn’t say “running it” because that would be too optimistic). bring it

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