Dudes, I need the following questions answered, STAT:

1.  If we are in trouble and need help, how do we call Batman? (Note: yes, we KNOW the commissioner uses a Bat signal.  However, information needed is: how do we joe schmoes call him since we do not have a giant bat-shaped million-watt spotlight in our backyard?)

2.  Where does Batman live? (Again, note: “Gotham City” does not suffice, need to know “Where is Gotham City?”)

If you could get back to me on these, L will stop being so exasperated with me for always answering, “Daddy will tell you when he gets home.”

_________________________________

Right, so I wrote a whole post about this already, but SERIOUSLY THE SLEEPING THING WHAT GIVES.  I am this very minute listening to Rosie do her little squinch and rustle for the eighth or maybe ninth time since we put her down at 7.  I know I always make fun of The Secret, but whatever: THIS BABY WILL SLEEP.  I AM PUTTING IT OUT INTO THE UNIVERSE.  P.S. UNIVERSE ALSO MAYBE I WILL COME INTO LOTS OF MONEY.

________________________________

Do you perhaps watch Mad Men?  If so, please enjoy this stinky penguin butt.