I’d like to announce my official bid for Senate.

About six months ago, Bug got into the habit of yelling this nonsensical phrase “Thirt-dee-DEE!” randomly throughout the house. Sometimes he said it to call me, sometimes he said it to call Lorso, sometimes he was just in his Happy Place and would sing song it while he played. It never ever failed to make me laugh. Something about the way he said it was so Alice In Wonderland/Looney Tunes/My Crazy Random Kid at His Best. Thirt-dee-DEE! Thirt-dee-DEE! (The emphasis on the last dee being the crucial bit.)

Thirt-dee-DEE has been retired for a while now though, and we’ve moved on to SILLY GOOSE and the ever popular BONKY, but lately, i.e. this weekend, I’ve really wished he’d conjure up that oldie but goodie one last time for me. Maybe then I could find a little bit of levity in the sound of Thirt and Dee.

Because today I turn thirty.

If you had asked me oh, six years or so ago what I might wish my thirtieth birthday to be like, I’m pretty sure I would have said 1. BIG PARTY and 2. LOTS OF DRINKING. Here’s what I would not have said: 1. BIG BELLY and 2. LOTS OF SNOT. I really think that when I saw that plus sign on the pregnancy test this year, one of the first things I thought was “Great, now I’ll have to party down with O’Douls for my thirtieth birthday.” This of course was after 1. Holy Shit I’m pregnant? and 2. Holy Shit I’m Pregnant! (followed by some happy type thoughts also, cross my heart.)

But no, for real, my thirtieth birthday has been on my mind for a long time. It seems like the biggest milestone birthday I’ve had yet – bigger than 18 (Legal: Lottery tickets! Voting! Jail!) bigger than 21 (Legal: Wine coolers! Coronitas!) bigger even than 25 (Legal: saving $10 on my car insurance!). I’m not even really able to pinpoint why exactly it seems so huge to me. It just does.

I think I also had the thought that being a jillion months pregnant might actually be a boon for a thirtieth birthday because it would distract me from any and all doom and gloom thoughts I might have on the subject. However. I did not really think about the fact that I would need something to distract me from BEING A JILLION MONTHS PREGNANT. Hey, I know, how about the fact that I’m turning thirty? NOOOOOOOBLEEEARGHHHH.

See how this is not working?

So here is how I am solving the problem: I am asking you, Internet, to deliver to me today on my birthday any and all distractions from 1. being a jillion months pregnant and 2. turning thirty. I will consider this the best of gifts. Tell me a funny story! A dirty joke! Your deepest darkest secret! What you had for lunch! Your grandmother’s middle name! Send me YouTube links! Recipes! (Ok, NOT recipes. They’re not really my bag. I got carried away.)

But you get the drift. Any and all randomness will be read and appreciated. And possibly even responded too – something I am not great at on a regular day. The wackier the better.

And I hope that you, whomever you are, wherever you are, and however old you are have a glorious September 8th. You didn’t know how monumental this day thirty years ago was, did you?

Well now you do.

18 comments

1 Adam Copeland { 09.08.08 at 8:02 am }
2 Allen { 09.08.08 at 9:15 am }

my second favorite blog:
http://listoftheday.blogspot.com/

3 candace { 09.08.08 at 9:52 am }
4 Amanda { 09.08.08 at 10:19 am }

Since my world revolves around my ankle pain at this point in my life, here’s a tip. Castor oil poured directly onto sore ankle, covered with a towel and topped off with a heating pad is a LOVELY comforting feeling…even if it ends up not really helping the tendonitis. And pineapple ginger tea is much more delicious than I thought it could ever possibly be (anti-inflammatory!).

Thirty is wonderful – mine has been a great year.

5 Allen { 09.08.08 at 10:49 am }
6 Gramps { 09.08.08 at 11:01 am }

Happy 30th, dear, from one who was there on that monumental day. You took your time getting here (due date was August 29, and the labor was long), but you were beautiful once you arrived (still are, for that matter!).

7 Rachel D { 09.08.08 at 11:34 am }

Happy Birthday Racher! Here is a post from a hilarious photo blog, with a relevant message.
http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/2008/05/time-to-par-tay.html

8 racher { 09.08.08 at 1:06 pm }

Adam – OMG I love TAL. I YouTubed it the other day and listened to it while I was organizing and cleaning. Stellar choice

Candace – I was going to go out for my birthday tonight, but instead I’m going to try to make $150 in the Bronx selling hotdogs. Totally addicting.

Amanda – I’m really hoping my future doesn’t involve castor oil (some people drink it to induce labor) but I’m glad it felt nice on your ankle

Allen – I TOTALLY thought you would come at me with a dirty joke. But I’m not disappointed – Lorso’s back thanks you.

Thanks Dad! :)

9 Andy { 09.08.08 at 1:38 pm }

On the occasion of your birth, I present:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7quH25cszo

and

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CX2MA3kXhRI

The first is weird, the second is excellent. Note the artist’s name.

10 mike { 09.08.08 at 1:40 pm }
11 racher { 09.08.08 at 2:43 pm }

Rachel – FAVORITE LINK YET. HAhahahahahaha. It a gril, y’all!

Mike – Bug totally appreciated the Batman one. And I appreciated the Tina Fey one, although, poor Tina Fey, you know? Also, would totally be hitting up that flea market if I lived anywhere close to Montgomery. It’s like a MINI MALL….

Andy – How is it that “Robot High School” is so reminiscent of ACTUAL high using only a black marble (?) and blood splattering balloons? Eerie. And is that actually YOU singing that Beastie Boys remake? It IS, isn’t it? You can’t fool me by the middle name switch!

I knew you Woodworth boys would be good for some good YouTube randomness.

12 Robert { 09.08.08 at 5:00 pm }

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/end

One of those stupid things that IT consultants laugh at in the middle of the night during a huge software migration (yes, I used to do that)…

13 alianora { 09.08.08 at 6:26 pm }

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I bring gifts! …for Bug. Sorry.

But this link was sent to me, and Griffin’s still kinda little for it, but here and here, you can get two free fisher price dvds.

and as for entertaining (or brain sucking, whichever), bring you Lions in Kenya!

14 David { 09.08.08 at 8:49 pm }

Here’s a little birthday present, fellow 9/8’er. This one had me in stitches a few weeks ago:

15 Gramps { 09.08.08 at 8:50 pm }

Check out this video from Chris’ website–he showed it tonite at the art talk. I told Bebe it was “vintage Chris McE…”

16 Gramps { 09.08.08 at 8:51 pm }

Well, stupid me–trying this again!
http://www.christophermcelroy.com/images.htm

17 Gramps { 09.08.08 at 8:54 pm }

I mean the first one–Okenoko–though the second is pretty characteristic as well.

18 Deb { 09.09.08 at 1:01 am }

1) I LOVE the pic of bug at the top of your page…I assume peering over his soon to see the world baby sister…

2) While I’m not a mom myself and haven’t tried the castor oil gig….rumor is….well, actually, fact, according to my hair dresser, that it’s REALLY effective, but it’s not just labor inducing, it’s “hurry call” inducing…and when her son came, he was flying and the paramedics just barely caught him….so yeah, not so much on the castor oil as far as I can tell.

3) Before you said “no recipes” the first thing that popped into my head was a recipe. Sorry. It was the first thing, so I have to send it….but it’s easy…

1) In a large pot over medium heat, melt 2 tbsp of butter and add 3-4 cloves of chopped garlic. Then add 1tbsp of cumin seeds (or 1 tsp of cumin powder). After a minute or so, add 1 cup of salsa, 2 cans diced tomatoes and 2 cans chicken (or veggie) broth. Reduce heat to low. Cover and simmer for 30 minutes. Take it off the heat, add some cilantro and voila! you have dinner! serve it with tortilla chips and jack cheese and you’ll be golden.

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