Currently on Stage 5

Stage 1: Before I was pregnant stage.

Noticed women who were pregnant and women with small babies. Not so much at fever pitch, but just casually aware of them existing.

Felt: a small urge to have that again.

Stage 2: Right after finding out I was pregnant stage.

Noticed that the pregnant woman population had apparently quadrupled overnight.

Felt: weirded out.

Stage 3: After discovering it was a girl stage.

Noticed the make up of every single family I passed on the street, saw in a magazine, stood behind in line at the grocery store, etc. you get the picture. Especially two children families with different gendered children. Was the boy older or the girl? How far apart were they? How frazzled did that woman look? Is the girl wearing boy hand me downs? Seriously does she look like she ever sleeps?

Felt: voyeuristic.

Stage 4: Getting big as Montana stage.

Noticed all the recently de-babied women with teeny sleeping babes in arms. Noticed the ease with which those women could walk. The slim ankles! The rings back on their fingers!

Felt: mildly jealous and bitchy.

Stage 5: Permanent waddling, hips dislocated, sausage fingers, unable to put on my own shoes unless they are slip-on stage.

Noticing all the non pregnant women with their skinny bellies and regular clothes and light beers and 10Ks and one chin.

Feeling: elephantine and murderous.

Stage 6: The deflated stage (i.e. the baby is OUT).

Will notice…no one. Will be too sleep deprived.

And anyway, the skinny girls will fade into oblivion. Days will be too filled with a different kind of girl. A girl with a round belly and rolly ankles and a couple of chins and no hopes of walking any time soon.

Have a hunch I’ll feel: like she’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

1 comment

1 Anjie { 08.28.08 at 3:11 pm }

i hope you think all of that about her…i, for one, can’t wait to meet her.

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