You’re thinking it was you, aren’t you. You are.

One thing that has been true for me in both this pregnancy and the last is that the hormones that are involved seem to bathe my brain in a way that temporarily switches my dream section to the ALL MEN ALL THE TIME setting. For one thing, I constantly dream about past boyfriends/crushes. In fact, when I was pregnant with Bug, I dreamed about every boyfriend I had ever had – almost in order – and said goodbye to them. Apparently my subconscious doesn’t do subtle.

Since I took care of the goodbyes last time, I guess this time my brain wants to have a little fun and has started just picking whomever the hell it wants to and making me love them in my sleep. Love them, smooch them, marry them, bear their children, whatever. My dentist – fair game! Checkout guy at Target – why not! Michael Phelps – well, he makes sense, since I see him every day (and also HAVE YOU SEEN HIS BODY). Everyone is a possibility. There are no boundaries to my brain’s HILARIOUS HILARITY.

And then last night I dreamed in two successive dreams (potty break in between, natch) that I was engaged to be married to two guys who are actual acquaintances of mine, in my age bracket. (Who may or may not live near me and whom I knew a long time ago or just met – I’m being intentionally vague here FYI.) This weirds me out more than dreams about being my dentist’s arm candy or the Target guy’s boo. First of all, neither of these guys are goofy looking or old or gay. Secondly, they’re both married. Thirdly, it’s just WAY WACKED OUT, SRSLY. I feel like because they are my age and my acquaintances, they will just know somehow that I dreamed about them (from their far away or close by range – I cannot stress my VAGUEY VAGUENESS about this enough) and then infer that I have a thing for them or something, which, I’d like to stress, I do not. Not even a little bit if I squinted.

My brain is turning me into a harlot.

4 comments

1 Ginny { 08.20.08 at 10:53 am }

or maybe it’s the hormones.

2 Leeann { 08.20.08 at 12:00 pm }

Ah yes, hot & trashy pregnancy dreams. I remember them well.

3 Allen { 08.20.08 at 2:11 pm }

Andy can be funny looking at times…

4 Dorothy { 08.20.08 at 7:26 pm }

It was P.Laney and Buz, wasn’t it?

Ha…yes, and mine lingered well into post pregnancy – they still pop up every once in a while, but shh – don’t tell russ.

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