The suckitude of strep throat

Wednesday night just before bed, I thought, “Gee willikers! My throat kind of hurts a little bit!” But went to bed, not thinking much of it.

Thursday morning I woke up and thought, “HOLY. SHIT. THROAT. HURTS.” See how illness robs me of all my good graces?

So I took a flashlight and peered into the abyss, and saw what looked like a Petri dish that someone forgot in a warm corner of the biology lab. And that is all the describing I will do of that, in case you like to read Yestertime leisurely while enjoying your lunch.

Luckily my sister was available not only to take Bug to school but also to substitute for me, which I think really does now take her out of contention for People I Can Reasonably Hope Will Give Me a Kidney Should I Ever Need One. I was willing to take that risk though.

When I got to the doctor, a minor miracle in and of itself – I got off the couch, put shoes on, and drove myself there – I was really feeling scummy. I think my fever was peaking right then, and it was clear to me that I looked like I had the plague, because everyone in the waiting room sat as far away from me as humanly possible, shifting uneasily in their chairs and casting nervous sideways glances at me. Now that I think about it, it was probably because I was physically restraining myself from moaning out loud, and I think sometimes I was unsuccessful at this endeavor.

I finally got called back to a room and the nurse chastised me for not wearing a coat (I had layers on, including a sweatshirt and a scarf, ok Mom?) and spoke to me as if I were about 5 or 6, which I LOVE, by the way. And by love I mean hate. So right after she left the room, just to prove to myself that I was in fact a grown up and not 6 years old, I burst into tears. I was still crying when the door opened and in came my doctor and a fourth year med student FROM MY MED SCHOOL came in. No! It wasn’t awkward at all, why do you ask? Honestly though, my dignity was long gone by then, what with the moaning in the waiting room and the sobbing, and the fact that I was wearing my pajamas and all.

So they checked me out, swabbed my throat, declared it STREP THROAT in about 2 seconds and gave me my prescription and I was on my way.

I guess I haven’t had strep throat in a really long time. I used to get it a lot as a kid. But I know it wasn’t as bad as this. If it was, then either I have become a really big pansy in my adulthood or I was one tough-ass kid. Because this strep throat thing SUCKS. Yesterday I would wake up long enough to take my penicillin and some painkillers and then think, “Wait what was I doing? Oh, right…zzzzzzz.” Pretty much I did that all day long.

So today is an improvement! I sit up! I type! I open my eyes for long stretches of time! I’m almost a real person again.

Now if I could only figure out where I got this nasty bug from. Maybe it was from the kid who sneezed in my mouth. Or maybe the kid who stuck his drooly fingers up my nose. Or maybe the kid who spit on me. Or maybe the kid who used me as a Kleenex. Or maybe the kid who licked my face.

Probably the Face-Licker. That kid has had it out for me since Day One.

February 16, 2008   3 Comments