We have owned a scooter for almost a year now, and I have never ridden it.

Until yesterday.

Did I care that the scooter was more suitable for a 6 foot 3 man than for my 5 foot 3-ness? No! Did I worry about the fact that it weighed as much as a small cow? Not me! Was I frightened of it’s speeds of up to 35 mph, downhill? Huh uh. I am reckless and daring like that.

Here I go, out of the driveway:

I arrive from my journey, master and champion of our fourth of a mile street loop (looking both ways before accelerating at the stop sign, of course. Maybe I classify more as “badass lite”):

I am badass enough however, to ride one handed. Oh yeah. :

And now, a montage of the finish:

And the dismount:

Fortunately for me, Lorso was kind enough to stop taking pictures at this point so that he could retrieve my body from under the scooter after it fell on top of me.

So much for badass.