Posts from — September 2007

haiku

racher is sleepy.
creative juice runneth dry.
better monday, swear.

September 30, 2007   No Comments

Raking leaves is fun

September 29, 2007   1 Comment

It’s like that Primal Fear movie. Sort of.

Sometimes I forget that the Bug is only two and a half. Like when I say to him in the car “Gosh it sure is nice outside today!” and he replies, “I like it when it’s nice outside. I especially like it because when it is not nice outside, I wish it was nice outside.”

I think I actually had that same conversation with an adult while in line at the grocery store the other day.

So, I forget that he’s two. Until, good God, I am reminded.

Like today – our day was going swimmingly. Bug was a charmer. He picked out his own clothes for school, ate all of his lunch, gently stroked the babies at the Parent’s Morning Out, saying, “Look at this sweet baby with the rolly legs!”, took an hour and a half long nap with almost no cajoling, and then happily bopped to the car for an errand.

And then the cosmic forces known as Being Two intervened.

And thus commenced Grand Master Showdown 2007.

He wanted to walk to a playground that was close to where we were, and while I was happy to oblige playground time, we didn’t have time to walk. A person who was not two would take this news and extract from it, “We get to go to the playground!” The two year old hears it and thinks “What?!!?!? We can’t WALK??!!??” And will proceed to melt all their circuits.

This is precisely what happened, and instead of a nice trip to the park, the Bug, my sister and I all had a WWE wrestling championship, complete with the public as audience members. Hooray.

And then, after we’ve finally gotten him back into the car after no trip to the playground, (this included sitting in the running car for about 10 minutes so as not to have to bodily force him into his seat), he sits there with his dirt and tear-streaked, sweaty face, and says to my sister, “Hey, I have a straw at my home that is purple!” With glee. As if it never happened. As if he has now morphed into the Jekyll side of his body and has no memory of Hyde.

September 28, 2007   2 Comments

On cleaning the bathroom shower

Our bathroom shower has gotten pretty disgusting. Okay, more than disgusting – last night, a particularly nasty piece of mold stood up while I was bathing the Bug and said “You missed a spot. And your hair looks like trash.” Man I hate mold.

But cleaning the bathroom shower falls under the category of Things You Should Be Doing If You Are To Be Considered Grown Up. I mean, it’s true – when considering adult-type people, I generally think they’ve got things like keeping the Health Department out of their house down pat.

In my head, the list includes such ghastly things as:

– paying bills and taxes

– having insurance

– getting the oil changed

– watching what you eat (this one currently has the majority of my contempt)

– owning a hose and/or lawnmower (using them however, is optional)

The list could go on.

And that is why I let my shower get to the point of creating new species. It’s so that in my small way, I can rebel against Being Grown Up and retain at least some semblance of a hold on my carefree days of yore.

You know, back before I squeegeed.

September 27, 2007   7 Comments

Conversation while jiggling a fussy baby on my hip

“I know why all these kids flock to you – they recognize your youth.”

“Ha, they recognize I’m a sucker is more like it.”

“No, I think it’s your youth – I mean, you’re only like 23, right?”

.

.

I’m just going to bask in that one for a while.

September 26, 2007   1 Comment